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英語六級作文范文及評析1

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英語六級作文范文及評析1

  Part I Writing   My opinion on certificate craze   The growing tendency among college students to get all kinds of certificates has now evolved into a craze. Just randomly ask a student what he or she is busily engaged in doing, quite possibly, you would get the answer that he or she is preparing for a certificate of some kind. So, whys the craze?   The reason behind this phenomenon is common the enormous pressure of finding a job. Faced with a harsh job market, most students have no choice but to seek more certificates to parlay their qualifications. Another factor is that diploma and certificates still weighs heavily in terms of signifying ones ability. For the sake of increasing their odds of landing a better job, the students are compelled to run from one exam to another.   Though I have an open mind toward the craze on certificates, I suggest that students should be more rational when it comes to certificates, since they do not necessarily tell their ability. Instead, they should be more involved in learning and capability boosting, thus, opportunities would come quite naturally.   文章點(diǎn)評:   這是一篇中等偏上的學(xué)生作文。 本文先對學(xué)生的考證熱進(jìn)行簡介,引出全篇;接著分析這一現(xiàn)象背后的原因;整體看思路清晰,邏輯嚴(yán)密,行文流暢,句式多變,用語較為地道。   本篇亮點(diǎn)表達(dá):   The growing tendency has now evolved into   be busily engaged in doing   The reason behind   harsh job market   have no choice but to   parlay their qualifications   sth. weighs heavily in terms of   increasing ones odds of   be involved in doing   be compelled to do   have an open mind toward   capability boosting   本文有待提高之處:   1. 文章結(jié)構(gòu)上,能看得出該同學(xué)試圖采用議論文的三段式。 邏輯嚴(yán)謹(jǐn),論證嚴(yán)密;句式表達(dá)靈活,用語較為地道。   2. 微觀語言點(diǎn)方面,有個(gè)主謂一致的方面的錯(cuò)誤;有些語句稍顯啰嗦,比quite possibly, you would get the answer that 大可簡化成youd most likely be told that 更好,意思沒有絲毫減損,表達(dá)力反而增強(qiáng)許多;另外某些用語多重復(fù),比如job多次出現(xiàn);為了避免此類現(xiàn)象,文中的the enormous pressure of finding a job 不妨改為 the enormous pressure of getting employed。   從整體看,本篇文章不錯(cuò),值得參考借鑒,不過用語方面還有待提高。

  

  Part I Writing   My opinion on certificate craze   The growing tendency among college students to get all kinds of certificates has now evolved into a craze. Just randomly ask a student what he or she is busily engaged in doing, quite possibly, you would get the answer that he or she is preparing for a certificate of some kind. So, whys the craze?   The reason behind this phenomenon is common the enormous pressure of finding a job. Faced with a harsh job market, most students have no choice but to seek more certificates to parlay their qualifications. Another factor is that diploma and certificates still weighs heavily in terms of signifying ones ability. For the sake of increasing their odds of landing a better job, the students are compelled to run from one exam to another.   Though I have an open mind toward the craze on certificates, I suggest that students should be more rational when it comes to certificates, since they do not necessarily tell their ability. Instead, they should be more involved in learning and capability boosting, thus, opportunities would come quite naturally.   文章點(diǎn)評:   這是一篇中等偏上的學(xué)生作文。 本文先對學(xué)生的考證熱進(jìn)行簡介,引出全篇;接著分析這一現(xiàn)象背后的原因;整體看思路清晰,邏輯嚴(yán)密,行文流暢,句式多變,用語較為地道。   本篇亮點(diǎn)表達(dá):   The growing tendency has now evolved into   be busily engaged in doing   The reason behind   harsh job market   have no choice but to   parlay their qualifications   sth. weighs heavily in terms of   increasing ones odds of   be involved in doing   be compelled to do   have an open mind toward   capability boosting   本文有待提高之處:   1. 文章結(jié)構(gòu)上,能看得出該同學(xué)試圖采用議論文的三段式。 邏輯嚴(yán)謹(jǐn),論證嚴(yán)密;句式表達(dá)靈活,用語較為地道。   2. 微觀語言點(diǎn)方面,有個(gè)主謂一致的方面的錯(cuò)誤;有些語句稍顯啰嗦,比quite possibly, you would get the answer that 大可簡化成youd most likely be told that 更好,意思沒有絲毫減損,表達(dá)力反而增強(qiáng)許多;另外某些用語多重復(fù),比如job多次出現(xiàn);為了避免此類現(xiàn)象,文中的the enormous pressure of finding a job 不妨改為 the enormous pressure of getting employed。   從整體看,本篇文章不錯(cuò),值得參考借鑒,不過用語方面還有待提高。

  

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